http://www.blogger.com/html?blogID=6174681299241123239 unimaginable beauty: November 2010

Sunday, November 21, 2010

our hearts were not made for bleeding.

Sometimes... I get really worried about you.

You stay in this slump... for so long. It makes me hurt to see you so broken like that.
You hide all your feelings away, pretending, always pretending, that everything's fine. When you know for a fact that it's not.
You take in what others say and you believe it all. You listen to them lie and tell you you're safe and loved, and then... you hear all the crap they're actually saying.
You walk through school wondering what everyone thinks about you, when you smile or do something wrong.

You act nice, to protect yourself. Just polite enough to keep them away, trying not to get close to people, for fear that they too, in turn, will leave you.

It's like the entire world is trying to take you down.
It's like they're trying to make your life a pure, living hell.

Sometimes, you cry. You cry yourself to sleep, wondering and wishing.
You fall deeper and deeper and deeper, always falling into that black swirl, surrounded by those four walls that listen to what no one else will.
The air around you starts to disappear, and you're choking, choking on nothing. Choking on pressure. Choking on yourself.

Until you break. You snap.
And then it's all over, for just that short little while.

Until the cycle starts again.